Looking Forward to Easter

     Well, it has been an amazing week so far!  I finally finished up my birth control pills so I don't have to deal with daily emotional breakdowns anymore!  :-)  And THAT makes me so very HAPPY!  It was just so hard on everyone; Caleb, Noah, me...I never knew when i was just going to break down into tears and not be able to stop crying...but worse than that even were the severe migraines I was getting on a daily basis. I am SO thankful that they are finally gone! It was just so hard taking care of a newborn when I could barely stand any light...but oh well. That's over with now! :-)  And everyone is SO much happier!  We're trusting the Lord with any future children we may have...and hoping He has in mind to let us wait a couple of years before having another one. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE being a mommy, but it would be great if Noah was out of diapers before the Lord sends another one along, lol. Oh well...it's completely in HIS hands...and we will trust Him with any decision he has for our family! 
     On a different note, tomorrow we're going over to color easter eggs at my Granny Jones' house. It has been a family tradition since, well...since I was born, lol. :-)  I'm even more excited about it this year because little Noah Bug gets to be there with us. Not that he is big enough to understand or enjoy it, but it's his very first Easter and we are so excited about it. I know he doesn't understand the "real Easter story" but we're reading to him out of his Baby Bible that our Pastor and his wife got for him. It's just such an amazing feeling to sit down and read the Bible to your child...a feeling I can't find the words to describe...simply that it is one of the best moments of parenthood!
     On Good Friday, I am heading over to Craig again to wak with two of my bestest friends ever...Anna and Trista. *big smile*  I can't wait to see her two little ones again...it's just so nice to have a friend who is at the same place in their life as what I am right now! It's great to be able to call her up and ask her questions about Noah, lol...because she has been through it not once, but twice before me!  And then of course, Anna is just so easy to talk to about anything...it's great having her around. After our walk, Noah and I are going grocery shopping with Anna and then heading back to Salem to hang out until Caleb gets home...who knows, maybe her hubby will join us when he gets off work! :-) 
     Saturday I have NO idea what I'm doing yet...I think my Mom might be coming over for a shopping trip...and that's always great fun!  More clothes for baby Noah...and maybe, just maybe, I can find some jeans for myself!  Who knows...shopping for me is a bit depressing these days...although, I have lost 32 pounds in 2 months...and I am very proud of myself for that! I am wearing my prepregnancy jeans again...but it's going to take forever to get back into size 6...and who knows if that is ever going to happen. I might just have to settle for my size 10 jeans lol....since that seems to be where I'm stuck at right now! All things are possible with God, though!
     Sunday, Easter, of course...we are going to church with my parents...they are having a guest speaker and invited us to spend Easter with them. I love our home church, but sometimes it's just so hard with all of our family living in Craig...while we live in Salem. Weekends are pretty much the only days that our family gets to see us...and Noah Bug, lol...and so our weekends are a mad rush to try and squeeze in seeing everyone!  *sighs* Don't get me wrong, I love it...but sometimes I think it would be easier if Mom lived like 5 minutes away!  Oh well...no biggie. Caleb and I both love Salem and moving back to Craig would put Caleb so much farther away from work...I just really miss my family sometimes. I can't wait for summer to get here, because I will get to spend everyday hanging out with my Mom (she works at a school so she gets her summers off!) and my other family. We've already planned weekly trips including going to the lake, shopping, walking, and one of our favorites...tanning!  Noah will be cozy under this beach umbrella...cuz I don't want a lobster baby, lol! 
      Well, I will probably wind this up for now! I gotta go get some cleaning done before my better half gets home! Then, we'll probably head over to WalMart for a bit...and maybe go for a walk together!  I don't really care what we do, actually...it's just great getting to spend time with such a wonderful family. Thanking God for them!

I FINALLY Have a Baby who Sleeps Through the Night!!!

     Well, I haven't posted in a while...life is keeping me really busy; that's for sure!  I honestly can't believe how fast life is passing by now that I have Noah. He will be 10 weeks old on Thursday and is getting bigger by the day. He isn't even 3 months old yet and is already wearing 6-9 months size clothing...WOW!  I went shopping with my Mom on Saturday just so I could find this kid some new clothes...and let me just say, stores just don't make very many varities of clothes for little boys. I went to WalMart and they have tons of Easter dresses/clothes for baby girls, but NOTHING for baby boys.  Grrrr...so, I am going to head over to Burlington to see if they have anything...I'm hoping to find a pair of Khakis for little man to wear with his new fancy shirt I got him for Easter!  :-)  We shall see.

     Oh, great news!  Noah is FINALLY sleeping through the night...and I'm talking 10-12 hours every night!  He goes to sleep between 8:30 and 9:30 every night and wakes up between 4am-5am to eat. Then, it's back to sleep until around 9-9:30ish...so, Caleb and I are truly blessed! :-)  It has made it so much easier to get through the day when we are getting that much sleep every night *sighs* God is so good! 
     Oh, more exciting news...Caleb and I are going to Florida for an entire week sometime in August or September. My Granny Spitzer goes down to visit my Aunt Renea every year and we have been invited to go....which pretty much means a free trip! :-)  We are really excited and it will be little Noah's first time seeing the ocean. I think he will definitely be able to enjoy it by then since he will be around 9 months old!  Not to mention, I get to get an awesome tan!!! :-)   I'm just so thankful Caleb has a job where he gets vacation time so we don't have to worry about him not getting paid for taking days off!  Again, God is good!
     So, Noah will probably wake up from his nap soon (yes, he takes about a 2 hour nap every day AND sleeps that long at night...and again, WOW!) so I guess I better get off of here. Oh, btw...if anyone has any baby clothes for boys, size 6 mon.-12 mon. and don't need them anymore, I would be very grateful. I hate paying so much for clothes when he outgrows them so quickly!  Thanks!

    

Life Gets Better by the Day

I don't have  much to write today...just that I am SO thankful to the Lord for everything He is doing in our lives.

 Sarah Kelly \ Living Hallelujah




Who am I?

That You came to earth for me

To die on a tree?

Who are you?

Son of man, Son of God

Yes, I believe it's true

More than words I bring to You

May all I say and may all I do be



CHORUS

Hallelujah, hallelujah

May everything about me be

Hallelujah to my King

Hallelujah, hallelujah

May everything about me be hallelujah



All of me

I surrender completely

Take control

I want all of You

So I'm letting go



I am healed and I'm forgiven

I am free because I'm living



CHORUS



It's all so clear, it's all so clear

I was born to worship



Hallelujah, hallelujah

May everything about me be hallelujah

 

Amazing Weekend!

     So, this weekend was one of the better ones I have had in a long time. It started out Saturday morning with breakfast at Granny Spitzer's, which is always so YUMMY! Then, we headed up on the mountain to visit Caleb's parents along with some other family members...then, it was back downtown to drop Noah off with my parents. They watched him all day yesterday and last night too...we drove over and went to church with them and picked up Noah. Then, it was back home to relax for a couple of hours before heading over to meet our AMAZING new friends, Sam and Rebecca; along with their adorable 19 month old, Henry. *sighs* Life has just been so overwhelming recently, it was just SO nice to finally meet another Christian couple. Not to mention, they are at almost the exact place in their lives as Caleb and I...Christians, college graduates, parents, and both Caleb and Sam work together. I am really looking forward to getting to know them better...not to mention, we are going to be setting up playdates *smile* so we will never really have to pay for a sitter, which is great for us, because they are SO expensive!  So, Sam and Rebecca, if you are reading this, thank you SO very much for letting us be a part of your life! :-)  I am anxious to see what the Lord has in store for our friendship!  Ok, well, I am going to get off of here for now...gotta get some cuddles from hubbz until our beautiful, precious darling wakes up and wants to eat again, lol!

I Officially HATE the pill!!!

So, yesterday was my birthday...which was awesome up until about 2pm-ish. Then, it all started to go downhill...for no other reason than my hormonal breakdown. I went back on birth control pills two weeks ago, which I was hesitant to do in the first place (I had a HORRIBLE experience with YAZ, which I was on before getting pregnant with Noah-I was an emotional wreck...always crying, constantly depressed, and didn't feel anything like myself). Now, I'm back on the pill (I tried a different kind) but I am starting to feel the same way all over again...and of course, it had to get really bad on my birthday...sheesh!  I got up early yesterday morning to go grocery shopping with my grandparents...as we do every Thursday together :-) and was in a WONDERFUL mood. They bought my lunch and came back to the apartment to hang out with lil man. They left and things went to crap. I started to cry hysterically...without having ANY reason as to why. Then, I remembered this is how I had felt when taking YAZ. We went over to Craig later yesterday evening and I was an emotional wreck...I did my best to hide it, but of course, my Mom knew something was wrong, lol...she just knows me too well. :-)  She insisted on "Mom and Daughter" time, which I was SO thankful for. After talking to my Mom, and having myself a good cry, I felt better. She convinced me to go off the pill and talk to my Midwife about trying something different. Caleb and I are still praying about what we are going to do, as we DO NOT want to get pregnant again right now...so, we shall see. Anyways, please pray for me as I get over this emotional bump in my life. I HATE feeling this way...I wanna feel like ME again...a happy, only emotional when it's "that time" of the month kind of girl!  Well, I'll always be emotional because I'm a woman, but that's normal...I just want the normal kind of hormonal issues....:-)  Well, I'm going to get off of here because who knows how long it will be before Noah wants Mama to hold him again, lol!

THRILLED!

     Ok, so tomorrow is my 23rd birthday...which I am SO totally excited about. I didn't really ask for anything this year because I have everything I could possibly dream of already, lol. Caleb has been talking constantly about my gift over the past couple of weeks...and telling me not to check our bank account and such...he has been really suspicious!  So, today, he tells me that Fed Ex will be bringing me a package and to make sure I am home to sign for it!  I opened the door and the guy hands me a box labeled DELL!!! I had no idea that I would be getting a new laptop computer...but I DID!!! Infact, the majority of my family went in together to get it for me...so I got the one I wanted...one we never would have been able to afford without everyone chipping in!
     Also, please pray for little Noah!  He has allergies and they have been really bad this week. I have to suction out the poor thing's nose at least every other day...I feel so bad for him. He always stays in a good mood, though, so we're thankful for that! Ok...gonna get off of here so I can go play with my new computer!!!

Make New Friends, but Keep the Old; One is Silver and the Other's Gold!

     Today I went back to see my midwife for my 6 week postnatal checkup. It went GREAT!  She checked my incision and said that it had healed perfectly, which was so nice to hear. All of my stitches have almost completely dissolved but the best part of it all; I GET TO START EXERCISING AGAIN....YAAAAYYYY!!!!  I can finally get rid of this yucky belly flab *big smile*!  I am starting my diet on Monday to kick start my weight loss (I have lost 27lbs since having Noah, which is quite the accomplishment, but I won't be happy until I can fit into my prepregnancy size; 6!).
     We also discussed how long we should wait to start trying for a second baby. My midwife suggested a year, just so that my body has time to fully recover from the whole labor process. Sooo, that meant family planning options. I had already been on the pill for about a year and a half before getting pregnant, so we went with that option. :-)   We still have a lot of praying to do about it, but we're currently thinking about trying for baby number two around august or september of next year. That way, Noah will hopefully be out of diapers when the next one comes along, and they won't be more than 3 years apart. I kind of want them to be close in age just so that Noah has a brother or sister he can relate to fairly well. I loved having a brother and he was only a year and a half younger than me...and it was awesome! :-)
     It's just so weird to think that by next fall I could be pregnant all over again, lol. The first trimester of pregnancy wasn't the greatest for me, but I loved it after that, lol. My favorite part of all was getting to feel my baby boy kick for the first time...and then of course holding him in my arms was, well, I can't really describe how truly incredible it was. Not to mention, he is like the most well behaved baby EVER, so deciding ot have another one wasn't really that hard of a decision to make! I just love being a Mommy so much...if we had the money I would have a whole slew of kids. But I want to be able to be able to give each and every one an equal opportunity in life; example: I want to be able to send them to college and help them pay for it...if I have like 10 kids, that probably wouldn't be happening, LOL! *big smile*  Well, I'll stop dreaming for a moment and get back to the present.
     Since Caleb started this new job, so many wonderful things have started to fall into place. He has become pretty good friends with one of his fellow co-workers. This friend has a wife my age who has an 18 month old and has decided to be a stay at home mom, as well. I am really looking forward to meeting and getting to know her, because it will be nice to have a new friend to talk to; especially one who is at the same place in her life that I am in mine. Sometimes it's hard to accept that friends drift apart, but the Lord always seems to provide a new opportunity for friendship...for this, I am very thankful. I am keeping my eyes and heart open for moments such as these. Not to mention, I have also rekindled my friendship with a couple of my best friends from childhood; Emily and Trista. :-)  Trista has a litlte girl only a couple of months younger than Noah...I am hoping they will be be able to grow up together. Trista and I are already planning to walk this summer over in Craig...pushing our babies in their stroller, lol. I can't wait..it's going to be so much fun! And Emily and her fiance Fletcher are coming to visit us next weekend. YAY! I can't wait. Then, sometime in April, we are taking Noah up to LU to watch one of their baseball games!  WOW! It's going to be such a great year...I am so excited to see everything the Lord has in store for me and my family!
     In closing, I would like to quote a song Emily, another girl, and I once performed on the very well known craig county auditorium stage.  "Make new friends, but keep the old; one is silver and the others gold. A circle is round, it has no end; that's how long I want to be your friend!" :-)

Missing a Friend

     Do you ever have one of those days where you just want to call up a really good friend but then you remember that you really aren't that close to them anymore?  It's moments like this that are harder on me than anything. I had this happen to me just today. I was having a wonderful day with my husband and brother, laughing and joking and whatnot, and thought "Hey, I'll just give --- a call (not naming names here)...because I remember how many great times we have had together...silly little inside jokes that no one will ever get except for us, lol. And that we went through something magical together; our pregnancies. Then, it hits me and I feel completely naseous. (We're NOT that close anymore for circumstances I had NO control over...and knowing I would give anything to change what happened... BUT I CAN'T!!!! This breaks my heart and I struggle with the hurt so much. Hurting for her, and me...both for different reasons.) Sorry, Raquel, but not today...I try to call up another friend but it's not quite the same. Not really awkward but I just keep thinking that if I was chatting it up with -- then I wouldn't feel so down. That this girl could really cheer me up...she is SO great at that. For reasons I can't control...we grew apart. And now, I spend more time than people know still trying to figure out a way to clear the air and avoid the awkardness that I know is going to come with our conversations. I've talked to my hubby, and my Mom who are both amazing and have given me great advice. Most importantly, I have spent countless hours in prayer to my amazing Savior...and the only answer I have so far received..."BE PATIENT"  And THAT is SO hard to do.  But still, I will obey my Lord and in this, I know He will do great things in this situation. He will answer prayers, provide me with the right things to say at the perfect moments...and then, maybe one day, not too far in the future, I will be able to think "Hey, I will just give -- a call!"  And I'll dial the number and on the other end I'll hear that beautiful voice that belongs to my friend. YES, forever and always my BFF.
     Heading to bed...it's been a weird day for me!

Exhausted..But Not Really Wanting to Go to Bed!

     So, it's almost 1am and I am currently forcing myself to stay awake so that I can feed Noah when he decides to wake up. Yeah, I should be sleeping but once I fall asleep I have SO much trouble getting myself to wake up, so it's easier for me just to stay awake for his first feeding during the night. Not to mention, Caleb has been doing ALL the night feedings almost every night since we brought the little booger home, lol. It has been working out really well that way, but he is getting an awful cold so I wanted to make sure he had his rest tonight.
     Life as a mommy has been going surprisingly better than I thought. I have my days where I just want to cry and never stop...but they are becoming few and far between. I think one of the biggest problems I am adjusting to and having to deal with is the fact that I am SUPER overprotective of Noah. Example: People (I'm using this term loosely because I have specific people in mind but I'm not going to mention any names) love to watch him...but, it's like, I don't even feel very comfortable with that. I tell them to do something a certain way, just because I know that Noah is used to a routine, but they choose to do it very differently. OR, if I specifically ask them not to hold him ALL the time...especially while he is sleeping (since we are doing our best to get him to sleep in his crib for naps and at nighttime) THEY DON'T LISTEN!  Grrr...it just makes me SO freaking angry. I went through hell to get him here; almost 10 LONG months of pregnancy, 14 hours of hard labor, and an emergency c-section. I love him with my whole heart. I never knew I would be SO posessive over my little one...especially with the same people I have trusted all my life. I honestly believe the ONLY person besides myself, that I feel 100% comfortable with being with him is my hubby...who does an amazing job as a Daddy! *big smile*
     The thing is, I really, really don't want to be this way. Infact, I HATE it...it's not like me to act like this. I guess when you have had that close of a connection with another human being...the fact that he lived and breathed inside of me for so long...makes trusting people with him really hard. I'm just so afraid that someone else will do something differently than how I do, and it will upset him...or that he will miss his mommy. I sound so stupid, but it's how I've been feeling over the past 5 weeks. I'm sure that feeling will fade over time..but I'm not expecting it to completely go away. It just means I love Noah more than he will ever be able to know....LOL.
     On to something else...Caleb and I have been working very hard to get Noah on a good sleep schedule. It's been pretty rough up til this point for the simple fact that he hasn't had much of a sleep pattern. It was pretty much all over the place. Well, for the past week, it has been more predictable, so we decided it was time to start a nightly bedtime ritual to hopefully ensure he starts to sleep a little better. Not that it's been bad so far...just that some nights he was going to sleep at 10, others at 1am, and still some nights around 7 or 8ish. It's just been so scattered, it's hard for Caleb and I to find any "us time" in the course of a day. So, we have started getting him ready for bed around 7pm which at best, takes an hour. Then, I start his soothing sounds (he seems to like the heartbeat the best), read him his favorite book (he LOVED hearing it when he was in my belly; Oh Baby the Places You'll Go...A Book to be Read in Utero!!!!), rock him for about 15 or so minutes and put him to bed. Not that he goes to sleep right away. He cries until we pick him up, rock him again, and back to bed. So, the cycle continues until he finally falls asleep, exhausted. Tonight was a real breakthrough for us, because although it took 2 hours for him to finally fall asleep, he was out before 10pm. Then, Caleb and I had time to talk, take our shower (yes, we shower together now, lol...not only because it saves time, but it's one of the few minutes we have during the day to ourselves...and it's hard to tell when Noah will wake up next and one of us has to rush out of the shower, soaking wet, to soothe him, lol), and get to bed. Now, my hubby is peacefully sleeping while I sit here and wait for my beautiful little boy to wake up and eat! *sighs* Who knew that I would ever be glad to sit here, TOTALLY exhausted, but not really wanting to go to sleep yet just so I can see and hold my angel.  I can't even begin to describe how thankful I am to the Lord for each and every blessing. God is truly good!
     PS-I'm really looking forward to this weekend...I get to spend some much needed time with the hubbz, and I also get to hang out with my brother, who I haven't really seen much since Noah was born. I really can't wait!

My Little Baby Werewolf

     Caleb and I have been joking about Noah being part werewolf, lol. For the past two full moons, he has been SO fussy a few days before we have one. Although, today he has been fairly well behaved, although his sleep cycles have been a bit off. In other words, my lovely husband hasn't been getting much sleep. He decided to get up during the nights with Noah since I am with him all day and evening. I take care of Noah Bug even after Caleb gets home in the evenings so Caleb has a chance to relax from his day at work. Speaking of work, his schedule changed last week so now he works 7-3:30...which means he is home by 4 every day!  I LOVE IT!!!!

     Not much has been happening...it has been exciting to watch my beautiful little one grow. He has already changed SO much since last month. One of my favorite things to do is just sit and watch all of his silly little faces he makes all the time, lol. In total I've only been away from the little guy for 8 hours since he was born. Once on Valentine's Day and also last Friday...just because hubby and I really needed a break. So, Mom watched him for awhile so I could get some errands done...and I actually got to cook a nice meal for my hubby! *big smile* 
     I think Caleb and I are finally adjusting to our roles as new parents. It was really overwhelming in the beginning and surprisingly scary at times. But now, things just seem SO normal...and it's hard to even imagine my life before Noah. He is such a joy to have in our lives and one of the best things I ever did, lol!
     I have a couple of events I'm really looking forward to over the next couple of months. In April, Mom and I are going to see the broadway show, Riverdance...one of the Christmas presents I got for her. We even have front row balcony seats...which is AWESOME!  We're taking the day to celebrate being "mommies"  so we are spending the day at the spa before the show. We've already got booked spa manis and pedis...and I cannot wait. Another event is alumni weekend at Roanoke College. It will be so nice to see all of my classmates again..especially my Seminar class. Everyone is really excited to see Noah, and Caleb and I definitely can't wait to show him off! YAY!!!.