Saturday, September 3, 2011

What Doesn't Kill You Makes You Stronger

     In reference to the date hubby and I have chosen to go on today. We decided on hiking and it's going to be 90 degrees and humid as H-E double hokey sticks. But, at least we will hopefully sweat off a few pounds, lol. This past month, Caleb and I are finally putting into effect which we had always discussed before having kids; that we would go out on a date together at least one night a week. Up until this point, we never really stuck to that, simply because I refused to let anyone keep the babies without me being around. I was an over protective parent and it really had started to take its effect on me. I was constantly stressed out and was snippy with Caleb, which always made me feel horrible because I never wanted to be that way with him. But now, that I'm finally over pregnancy and postnatal hormones and have been willing to ease up and leave the kids with sitters, I'm a brand new person. I'm being totally serious, too. I was a weepy, stressed out mess, but now, I am so happy most of the time. Small issues don't really effect me and I'm finally starting to feel like I can balance two under two, be the wife I need to be, and that makes me feel amazing. I am so thankful God has blessed me with the role of being a stay at home mom, because I really love it. There are rough days, but that would happen no matter what my role is life was. I just can't believe that God has blessed me with so much.
     I've been wanting to write these thoughts down for so long, because I constantly have people tell me that my life seems so perfect.  It's perfect because it's in God's plan for me but it isn't always "perfect" in the sense that I am far from it when it comes to parenting. I cry. I get frustrated and lose my temper. I have days that I wish I did have a career. I argue with my husband on occasion over silly little things that don't really matter.  Life, on this side of Heaven, can never actually be perfect, because sin exists. But, I honestly feel that I am living out God's will for my life. I never thought I would have the option to stay at home and raise my kids, but since this is the role God has placed me in, I trust it's the perfect career for me right now. 
     I also believe that God is leading our family to homeschool out kids, and I will joyfully do that. That, along with other things, may change in the next several years, but in everything I do, I want it to be for God's glory. How could I not want to do that? He has given me everything and praising His name seems so small compared to what He has done for me. I hope each of you has a wonderful weekend!! God bless you all.

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